BIG NOISE

Summers here and I have again developed the disturbing habit of watching mainly Japanese engined British made Choppers on ebay. I never liked Harleys even before all the idiot advertising people in Soho started buying them. I can't stand these overblown, overpriced glitzy American chops you see on those satellite TV programs either but there is something about a simple, stripped down British made hardtail which has had my blood pumping since I was a greasy haired 11 year old Motorhead fan.

There are a thousand reasons why I shouldn't buy one. I live in London, which people struggle to get round on trail bikes let alone feet forward nightmares with zero back suspension. I don't need a motorbike to get around London and if I wanted to go any further than the M25 it'd be much more sensible to buy a conventional road bike. My back is already a bit fucked and my shoulder. No suspension? Reach forward riding position? Great idea. Where would I park it? The summer will be over soon and would I want to ride one in winter?

All of these reasons are seriously challenged by my heart strings and the fact that I am a bit of an impulsive fucker and have wanted one of these my whole life . Somebody stop me.

Fairly modern GSX600 engine, went for a grand and a half. I even like the red frame though I would want a sprung saddle.

Slightly less painful riding position. Seriously pretty XVS650 went on ebay for two grand

An unfinnished XS650 project sold for a grand.

A crazy looking one off project based around a Suzuki 750 engine this has got a hand made tank, welded chain built into the front of the frame and the wheels are fifteen inches across. Sold for six hundred quid. I am not sure I could get it on the road though- or round bloody corners when it was there come to think of it!

Reliability issues and the fact that I am not a good mechanic would probably put me off buying an old British engined chop, but they do sound bloody sexy and if you can keep them going they always hold their price.


My favourite, with a Z750 engine, the same owner for the last 11 years, taxed and tested- didn't sell, and I kept the guys number. No indicators, no mirrors, arms in the air so no chance of looking over your shoulder and I'd have to ride it back from the Scottish border. Maybe my mum dropped me on my head when I was a baby. Its strange because my parents were actually really sensible people, both of them. I think I need to be tied up. Help!

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DREAMS OF SHIT AND HANGING

I woke up with a start this morning. I had one of those epic dreams which seems to go on forever. The low points were horrible. I was working in a restaurant. One of the staff pushed someone in with a rope around their neck, threw the other end over a high rafter and hung the person he was shouting at everyone else brandishing a gun. Everyone knew this person and was in fear of him. I was also, though I had a little gun in my pocket I was scared to try and use it and miss. I went down to the basement of the restaurant with this person and pretended to make small talk, clearing the tables.

In another part of this dream I was wandering with a group of people who were all naked. We reached a sort of marble platform which had plants intertwined with strange metal structures. needed a dump and told the others it was OK to shit anywhere. Pretty soon there was what looked like big rabbit droppings in amongst the plants. Then a group of people in chefs clothes came and started pouring chocolate onto the plateau. We hadn't realised it was a chocolate making facility and didn't tell them we had shit on it.

What is all that about then?

I have been able to get to the trial a couple of times. Cross examination is supposed to be the most interesting part but in this case it hasn't been. Its all a bit predictable. I would say it was a "boring score draw" between Hamid and the prosecution.

"You are a terrorist recruiter"

"No I'm not."

etc etc.

Hamid appears to be playing himself with his "I can assure you 150 percent"s and "I couldn't tell you pecifically" , I'm not sure who the prosecution guy is playing.

Hamid said he belonged to one of the same "four schools" that 90% of Muslims belong to. He added that Hamza had banned these schools from Finsbury park Mosque.

The day before yesterday was a bit more interesting as we had some live witnesses incliding Phil Rees. I got a chance to speak to him and had a look at his site after, I didn't realise he was behind probably the only "War on Terror" based stuff I have seen on TV that I liked.

Nasreen Suleaman, who had found all of the people who appeared in "Don't Panic I'm Islamic" also gave evidence and appeared in the Sun the next day for her trouble. the most interesting witness was a young Turkish Muslim who took over the witness box and told the court off for holding Hamid, as he was innocent. He said Hamid had always tried to steer him to the correct path, away from drugs and crime which had worked sometimes. He had never been in favour of or tried to recruit him for terrorism. He leaned right in to the Microphone to talk about conspiracy theories etc and didn't want to leave at the end, again protesting Hamid's innocence.

Another bearded young Muslim from Weybridge claimed Hamid had helped him get off alchoholism and lent him the money to accompany his group on a trip to Morrocco. He hadn't paid the full amount back. Cross examined he said that on the trip everyone argued with everyone else. They were angry with him because he snored loudly in the van. The trip was a success in that they achieved their aim of getting to Morrocco and getting back.

A very fetching blonde Irish woman spoke, saying she was an athiest who often talked to Hamid at his dawah stall and over coffee. She said he was frequesntly abused by passers by who called him "terrorist" and that when she was with him, passing Muslims also abused him for talking to her, calling her "Kaffir".

In the afternoon the defence showed the jury some of Hamid's conspiracy theory videos starting with Illuminazi, at which point I left because I've seen them all a long time ago. The Turkish Muslim guy who gave evidence gave me a couple of leaflets which had been on Hamid's stall including Terrorism and Islam: Exploding the Myths.

Yesterday I managed a few hours of cross examination which went back to the You're a terrorist recruiter- No I'm not strand of peculiarity. The prosecution guy is saying he is, Hamid is saying he isn't. For more information click on the links below.

Cheers.

Times, The Sun, The Sun again,The Mirror, Daily Mail, UPI ,etc

All of this has been synthesised from one journalist's work. Cos he is working for an agency he doesn't get credited so I'll credit him here. Well done Paddy.