I thought I'd bring you a bit of happy channel surfing, bigging up my personal bright lights of blogworld.
Over on channel five you've got...err...us. I was a bit nervous when the deekster told me that he was going to put up the conversation we had in the pub, but listening to it, its quite a bright advert for low-fi instant media. From a simple walkman using its own internal mike, digitaly tranformed and broadcast into cyberspace.
I've been nervously clicking into Mike H world for a couple of days now, trying to discern whether he was kicking back in Milan with old friends or lying in the gutters of Milan with a needle in his arm, surrounded by a load of seedy underworld characters. The first time Mr. H was going to inject himself infront of me I left the room. The second time, straight after filming with Barry the Boss, I still had my camera with, so I decided to film instead.
"You're not going to die are you?"
Mr. H defies the media junkie sterotype. I think he has the advantage because he is alive to the experience of life, good or bad as long as it is rich in intensity. A new post is up! Our favourite performance junkie is still alive then!
Right up at the other end of the dial, and crossing the Atlantic, tuning into deepest Texas miss blindin' nashers is Dreaming about her Grandma and getting into some Iraqi poetry without succuming to any urges to make hay with us raging leftie anti-war bastards.
Keeping with the Texan vibe, Kimberley is resurecting more twisted tales from her life at Enron. She was kind enough to give us version one of this story. Version two unearths yet more from the dark shadows of capitalism.
And finnaly, still in the USA, our ex-millenial girl
is bringing us tales of CORUPTION, and Dwarfs.
Thats it!
April 30, 2005
April 29, 2005
ABU HAMZA'S SON
Now they no longer have the mosque, I don't see the evil Finsbury Park terrorist posee so much, but I still want as many people as possible who appear in the 40 hours or so of footage I have of their protest to contribute to my documentary.
This will possibly be easier now. For most of the protest the Muslims often instructed each other not to talk to me. Abdullah and Hamza once issued an edict that no one was supposed to speak to "the media" but Hamza. I could understand why. The situation was literally hysterical and they thought that if anyone said anything out of line, Hamza would get it in the neck.
I didn't consider myself to be "the media" and as far as I was concerned, every individual was taking the risk of being there, worshiping under the media spotlight so I took the view that every individual was welcome to say why to my camera if they wanted to. The young guys were the best. Really mellow London boyas.
With this is mind I got in touch with Jamal (see ALLAH AND JALLIAH) asking if he had heard from the one of Abu Hamza's sons that I had met. To me he introduced himself as Abu Haffs, in the papers he is known as Mustapha Kamel. Mustapha perhaps not suprisingly looks like a slightly smaller version of Abu Hamza though I would imagine most people wouldn't make the connection unless they knew.
I didn't speak to him so much in the two years that I covered the protest. The last time I had seen him was outside the mosque when he had told me that I should become a Muslim. We had discussed this for a while, but it wasn't easy. I felt like a fish out of water on their turf.
I'm not sure how serendipity would square with Islam, but coming out of a well known West London shopping centre yesterday, who did I bump into but Mustapha himself. Looking good, hair slicked back with one of his friends. Apparently they are both musicians now. I hope I remembered to ask if his dad was OK but I am not sure.
He confirmed that the trial was set for the 4th July. They told me they were bringing out a cd of Islamic music and showed me the cd, which from the cover looked fairly professional. I asked them both if they would like to contribute further to the film.
"As long as it is positive, we'll talk about it." they told me. "We want to get our message across to the kids with our music."
We exchanged emails and phone numbers. I said that it felt easier for me talking to them away from the Mosque which they understood.
"You know, on Friday we get our best clothes on and we go to pray. We don't have nothing against no one."
They asked me if the bones in my ears were tribal. I can't remember what I answered. The difference between what I read in the news about these guys and what I have experienced for myself always blows me away. Its like they are talking about different people. I find it hard to believe that the 20th hijacker, Bourgass, Asif Hanif, Every Muslim accused or convicted of anything are supposed to have passed through Finsbury Park mosque circa 1999-2002.
I don't have a clue. I always thought that if none of the people I met were getting arrested, there was no harm in me talking to them. I left it to all the other news gatherers to come with their accusations and then leave. I had a lot of fun filming them doing so. If you want their news, the links are down the side of this blog. This is MALUNG TV NEWS.
This will possibly be easier now. For most of the protest the Muslims often instructed each other not to talk to me. Abdullah and Hamza once issued an edict that no one was supposed to speak to "the media" but Hamza. I could understand why. The situation was literally hysterical and they thought that if anyone said anything out of line, Hamza would get it in the neck.
I didn't consider myself to be "the media" and as far as I was concerned, every individual was taking the risk of being there, worshiping under the media spotlight so I took the view that every individual was welcome to say why to my camera if they wanted to. The young guys were the best. Really mellow London boyas.
With this is mind I got in touch with Jamal (see ALLAH AND JALLIAH) asking if he had heard from the one of Abu Hamza's sons that I had met. To me he introduced himself as Abu Haffs, in the papers he is known as Mustapha Kamel. Mustapha perhaps not suprisingly looks like a slightly smaller version of Abu Hamza though I would imagine most people wouldn't make the connection unless they knew.
I didn't speak to him so much in the two years that I covered the protest. The last time I had seen him was outside the mosque when he had told me that I should become a Muslim. We had discussed this for a while, but it wasn't easy. I felt like a fish out of water on their turf.
I'm not sure how serendipity would square with Islam, but coming out of a well known West London shopping centre yesterday, who did I bump into but Mustapha himself. Looking good, hair slicked back with one of his friends. Apparently they are both musicians now. I hope I remembered to ask if his dad was OK but I am not sure.
He confirmed that the trial was set for the 4th July. They told me they were bringing out a cd of Islamic music and showed me the cd, which from the cover looked fairly professional. I asked them both if they would like to contribute further to the film.
"As long as it is positive, we'll talk about it." they told me. "We want to get our message across to the kids with our music."
We exchanged emails and phone numbers. I said that it felt easier for me talking to them away from the Mosque which they understood.
"You know, on Friday we get our best clothes on and we go to pray. We don't have nothing against no one."
They asked me if the bones in my ears were tribal. I can't remember what I answered. The difference between what I read in the news about these guys and what I have experienced for myself always blows me away. Its like they are talking about different people. I find it hard to believe that the 20th hijacker, Bourgass, Asif Hanif, Every Muslim accused or convicted of anything are supposed to have passed through Finsbury Park mosque circa 1999-2002.
I don't have a clue. I always thought that if none of the people I met were getting arrested, there was no harm in me talking to them. I left it to all the other news gatherers to come with their accusations and then leave. I had a lot of fun filming them doing so. If you want their news, the links are down the side of this blog. This is MALUNG TV NEWS.
ANARCHIST MISSION CONTROL
Mayday is on again this year. As Republicans often point out, many soldiers have died for my right to protest so I had better take it seriously.
I sometimes circulate among these people. Our lot used to run an excellent squatted cafe in Kentish Town. They had an anti-copyright cinema, where they used to show cracked div-x's of movies they downloaded from the internet for free. I found them to be by and large, highly principled people. They had great press in the local papers for what they were doing and the building they were evicted from is still lying empty now.
A lot of them, for their own reasons, have a pathalogical hatred of the Police which I really can't get into anymore. Since Maggie the Thatch has dissapeared I really cant take it all that seriously. I didn't feel justified in making myself a Police problem, even when most of my life was illegal. I wrote a fuller explanation of the views I hold about our uniformed brothers and sisters in London here
In Finsbury Park, I thought the way Police and Muslims treated each other over the two years said a lot about the British people which I hope I will be able to get across in my documentary.
This article contains Islington Borough Commander Barry Norman's views on the subject.
Another difference I have with my anarchist brothers and sisters is their choice of target. Last christmas they protested Band aid. They had their reasons but I thought
"Don't raise money for starving people! You evil people! We protest!" was the likely message which would come across.
I got hold of a pre-Mayday flyer and who do they want to protest? Jamie Oliver of course!
"Don't go on a mission to change the diet of school-children throughout this country! You evil person! We protest!"
I was incredulous. I looked on their website to find Jamie Oliver had been removed from the list. I am sure we can all imagine the conversations which went on behind the scenes there.
April 28, 2005
THE OTHER SIDE
Look, I didn't support the Iraq war, and still don't believe that someone as rich as George Bush would invade Iraq for the right reasons. But I have no axe to grind.
I saw how much effort peace campaigners put in to stopping the war first hand in Parliament square London as the bombs were dropping.
Yesterday I heard Jeremy Corbyn and Robin Cook saying how proud they were of the biggest protest march in history. Why? These people went home. They didn't try and stop a war, or sit down next to the children who did.
A couple of weeks later, I was happy to see Saddam's statue fall. As I say, I have no axe to grind. In the following months I spent much more time online talking to people I disagreed with that those I agreed with. How the fuck else can any progress be made?
This is why we at socialistwanker link to people like conservative punk. I fucking hate Bush, but thanks to "my political enemies" I read this and challenge my own perspective.
I saw how much effort peace campaigners put in to stopping the war first hand in Parliament square London as the bombs were dropping.
Yesterday I heard Jeremy Corbyn and Robin Cook saying how proud they were of the biggest protest march in history. Why? These people went home. They didn't try and stop a war, or sit down next to the children who did.
A couple of weeks later, I was happy to see Saddam's statue fall. As I say, I have no axe to grind. In the following months I spent much more time online talking to people I disagreed with that those I agreed with. How the fuck else can any progress be made?
This is why we at socialistwanker link to people like conservative punk. I fucking hate Bush, but thanks to "my political enemies" I read this and challenge my own perspective.
April 27, 2005
ROBIN COOK
I wasn't going to pay much attention to the election this time around, but the deeksters new election blog five.org guilted me into it. This led me to Bethnal green to check out the Ooooona vs. Galloway square-up (see LIBERAL EXTREMISTS?) which was fun, but still didn't make me feel like voting.
After my outburst about intellectual elitism I've had a change of heart. I've decided that bloggers are the new elite and we should all henceforth sneer down our noses at everyone who isn't obsessivley clicking, downloading free site meters, uploading photos and inflicting their commentary on the world for free. Right wing or left WE are the elite and everyone else is beneath us SO THERE. We must stick together, develop a code of conduct and not let anyone else into our tiny little posse.
Clicking through five.org (a bloggers election coverage and therefore cosher for THE ELITE) I saw this invite to a Labour "hustings" where our ex-Foreign secretary (who famously resigned over the war) was going to explain to us why we should still vote Labour. I went along, more in hopes of meeting up with deek for the first time, but also half interested in what the Politicians would have to say.
I got there early, there were maybe five geeky looking people in the room. They looked at me nervously and admitted to being members of the Labour party.
"Is this Labour party members only?" I asked.
They assured me it wasn't and then studiously ignored me. As I sat there, the small room filled up with more geeks. Now these are not the type of geeks associated with computers (strange looking closet anarchists who hack in their spare time) but a special sort of political geek
(strange looking people from... well fuck nose! I've really got to get into this...where the fuck do people come from who discuss what conditon a Labour party banner was in since the last time they got it out?... I also overheard them discussing how to overthrow Tony Blair)
Its wierd, I met exactly the same sort of people at a Socialist Alliance meeting they tried to throw us out of just before the war. (see DAY-X)
This got me wondering whether Tory hustings would be full of the same sort of geeks but with more money. What is it about politics which attracts such huge media attention but such tiny groups of misfits in real life? Whatever it is, when it changes so will the country.
GALLOWAY! shout the media. I turn up, there are 600 people in the room.
ROBIN COOK! and there are about 60.
By my reckoning I should write SQUAT PARTY, 1000 people turn up and we should make the front pages no? With loads of journalists turning up to write about who has fallen out with who, about such and such a DJ's set or so and so's bad ketamine.
Robin Cook was actually quite a passable comedian. I had met Jeremy Corbyn before when they first reopened Finsbury Park Mosque (see THE BROTHERS GONNA WORK IT OUT). Then and now he comes across as quite honest for a politician. And he cycles everywhere which would get my vote in itself if I were in his constituency.
When the war first started I was much more angry which made me much braver. Sitting surrounded by political geeks I didn't pipe up come question time. (fucking chicken)The question I didn't ask:
"Robin, I'm not really that into politics and I'm a bit thick, like, but didn't you announce Britains first ever Ethical defence policy and then sell arms to the Indonesians?"
After my outburst about intellectual elitism I've had a change of heart. I've decided that bloggers are the new elite and we should all henceforth sneer down our noses at everyone who isn't obsessivley clicking, downloading free site meters, uploading photos and inflicting their commentary on the world for free. Right wing or left WE are the elite and everyone else is beneath us SO THERE. We must stick together, develop a code of conduct and not let anyone else into our tiny little posse.
Clicking through five.org (a bloggers election coverage and therefore cosher for THE ELITE) I saw this invite to a Labour "hustings" where our ex-Foreign secretary (who famously resigned over the war) was going to explain to us why we should still vote Labour. I went along, more in hopes of meeting up with deek for the first time, but also half interested in what the Politicians would have to say.
I got there early, there were maybe five geeky looking people in the room. They looked at me nervously and admitted to being members of the Labour party.
"Is this Labour party members only?" I asked.
They assured me it wasn't and then studiously ignored me. As I sat there, the small room filled up with more geeks. Now these are not the type of geeks associated with computers (strange looking closet anarchists who hack in their spare time) but a special sort of political geek
(strange looking people from... well fuck nose! I've really got to get into this...where the fuck do people come from who discuss what conditon a Labour party banner was in since the last time they got it out?... I also overheard them discussing how to overthrow Tony Blair)
Its wierd, I met exactly the same sort of people at a Socialist Alliance meeting they tried to throw us out of just before the war. (see DAY-X)
This got me wondering whether Tory hustings would be full of the same sort of geeks but with more money. What is it about politics which attracts such huge media attention but such tiny groups of misfits in real life? Whatever it is, when it changes so will the country.
GALLOWAY! shout the media. I turn up, there are 600 people in the room.
ROBIN COOK! and there are about 60.
By my reckoning I should write SQUAT PARTY, 1000 people turn up and we should make the front pages no? With loads of journalists turning up to write about who has fallen out with who, about such and such a DJ's set or so and so's bad ketamine.
Robin Cook was actually quite a passable comedian. I had met Jeremy Corbyn before when they first reopened Finsbury Park Mosque (see THE BROTHERS GONNA WORK IT OUT). Then and now he comes across as quite honest for a politician. And he cycles everywhere which would get my vote in itself if I were in his constituency.
When the war first started I was much more angry which made me much braver. Sitting surrounded by political geeks I didn't pipe up come question time. (fucking chicken)The question I didn't ask:
"Robin, I'm not really that into politics and I'm a bit thick, like, but didn't you announce Britains first ever Ethical defence policy and then sell arms to the Indonesians?"
GALLOWAY
Turns out the guy I met who was asking Mr. Galloway the wrong questions was an Independent columnist.
He (Galloway) has been telling the most alienated Muslim men in Britain that Tony Blair is "waging a war on Muslims ... at home and abroad". He is nudging towards a kind of inverse Powellism that tells the Muslim community it is under siege from a brutal terrorist state that will stop at nothing. Rivers of blood, he implies, are only months away.
Galloway has now called for Saddam's foreign minister, Tariq Aziz, to be released without charge. Not to an international court; just released. "An eminent diplomatic and intellectual person" held "without any justification," was how Galloway described the man he spent a very merry Christmas with in 1999.
I asked Galloway how many Muslims had been murdered by his friend Aziz. The correct answer: even more than have been slaughtered by Ariel Sharon, or by Israel in 38 years of occupying Gaza and the West Bank. Galloway said, "Why don't you go and take some more drugs, you druggie?"
Full articlehere
He (Galloway) has been telling the most alienated Muslim men in Britain that Tony Blair is "waging a war on Muslims ... at home and abroad". He is nudging towards a kind of inverse Powellism that tells the Muslim community it is under siege from a brutal terrorist state that will stop at nothing. Rivers of blood, he implies, are only months away.
Galloway has now called for Saddam's foreign minister, Tariq Aziz, to be released without charge. Not to an international court; just released. "An eminent diplomatic and intellectual person" held "without any justification," was how Galloway described the man he spent a very merry Christmas with in 1999.
I asked Galloway how many Muslims had been murdered by his friend Aziz. The correct answer: even more than have been slaughtered by Ariel Sharon, or by Israel in 38 years of occupying Gaza and the West Bank. Galloway said, "Why don't you go and take some more drugs, you druggie?"
Full articlehere
April 26, 2005
FUCKING IMMIGRANTS 3
Covering the Abu Hamza story brought me into contact with a number of newsmen who I had instant respect for. One of these, Vivien White, anchored a blinding edition of Panorama last night on the issue of immigration. I bumped into him outside Belmarsh prison when Hamza was first arrested. With all the other newspeople making me feel really uncomfortable I had an excellent conversation with him (see HAMZA ARRESTED)
The "everyman" characteristic he exhibited to me shinned out on the program as he spoke to those in government, people on busses and the immigrants themselves. Seeing the reality of these people lives will hopefully soften a few hearts. Well done Panorama.
Outside Belmarsh, he told me that if I didn't have any luck with Channel 4 to go to the BBC. The idea seemed ludicrous at the time as I knew that Abdullah and co hated the BBC and believed them to be part of the "Zionist media conspiracy" more than anyone else.
The "everyman" characteristic he exhibited to me shinned out on the program as he spoke to those in government, people on busses and the immigrants themselves. Seeing the reality of these people lives will hopefully soften a few hearts. Well done Panorama.
Outside Belmarsh, he told me that if I didn't have any luck with Channel 4 to go to the BBC. The idea seemed ludicrous at the time as I knew that Abdullah and co hated the BBC and believed them to be part of the "Zionist media conspiracy" more than anyone else.
FUCKING IMMIGRANTS 2
I had a very enlightening conversation with "voter X" over the weekend. "Voter X" lives on the south coast of England. We used to argue about politics quite a lot. It is very interesting how his views have changed over the years. I wonder if his views will reflect on the upcoming elections.
Right and left wing used to be extremely polarised in this country. Its not anymore which makes me really happy in itself even though nothing has changed.
"Voter X" now considers the environment to be his number one issue, even though he is as right wing as most people in rural England. His second biggest issue is immigration. His wife works with the Police. When they encounter illegal immigrants in rural England, with no papers, and no idea what they are doing in this country, they arrest them for a night, let them out in the morning and tell them
"Go to Croydon."
We live in a bit of a bubble in London, strangers are everywhere. People are suspicious of strangers in rural England so talking to "Voter X" makes me wonder if the evil Howard will get in, as rural England seems, unfortunately to be thinking what he is thinking.
The strangest thing is that the one issue which will stop "voter X" voting Tory (I hope) is the economy. Its wierd to think that the one party which for 18 years came across as "big buisness and fuck everyone else" is in a situation where it is not trusted by its core support to run the economy.
"Voter X" is hoping (as I am) for a hung parliament.
"Make the fuckers work together for the good of the people for a change." he told me.
Right and left wing used to be extremely polarised in this country. Its not anymore which makes me really happy in itself even though nothing has changed.
"Voter X" now considers the environment to be his number one issue, even though he is as right wing as most people in rural England. His second biggest issue is immigration. His wife works with the Police. When they encounter illegal immigrants in rural England, with no papers, and no idea what they are doing in this country, they arrest them for a night, let them out in the morning and tell them
"Go to Croydon."
We live in a bit of a bubble in London, strangers are everywhere. People are suspicious of strangers in rural England so talking to "Voter X" makes me wonder if the evil Howard will get in, as rural England seems, unfortunately to be thinking what he is thinking.
The strangest thing is that the one issue which will stop "voter X" voting Tory (I hope) is the economy. Its wierd to think that the one party which for 18 years came across as "big buisness and fuck everyone else" is in a situation where it is not trusted by its core support to run the economy.
"Voter X" is hoping (as I am) for a hung parliament.
"Make the fuckers work together for the good of the people for a change." he told me.
FUCKING IMMIGRANTS 1
For those who don't know I am a big fan of Jon Snow's snowmails:
Immigration, immigration, immigration
========================================
If 1997 was "education, education education" for Labour, the Tories have ensured that this one is "immigration, immigration, immigration".
Michael Howard is telling his constituents by letter tonight that asylum seekers have cost Kent County Council £258,914,943. He doesn't mention that the county has so far been re-imbursed by central government to the tune of some £240 million and that the rest is pending verification of the accounts, but let it pass.The big news tonight is that the CBI director, top dog in the British boss fraternity, has damned Tory plans to cap immigration. On Channel Four News tonight, Sir Digby Jones says in effect that British business is NOT thinking what Mr Howard's thinking on immigration.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Immigration is a big issue in the elections coming up over here. On this news program Digby Jones from the CBI (who I always hated) stated that a one percent rise in immigration brought a one-and a-half percent boost to the economy. Roughly translated as FUCK YOU Tory wankers.
Immigration, immigration, immigration
========================================
If 1997 was "education, education education" for Labour, the Tories have ensured that this one is "immigration, immigration, immigration".
Michael Howard is telling his constituents by letter tonight that asylum seekers have cost Kent County Council £258,914,943. He doesn't mention that the county has so far been re-imbursed by central government to the tune of some £240 million and that the rest is pending verification of the accounts, but let it pass.The big news tonight is that the CBI director, top dog in the British boss fraternity, has damned Tory plans to cap immigration. On Channel Four News tonight, Sir Digby Jones says in effect that British business is NOT thinking what Mr Howard's thinking on immigration.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Immigration is a big issue in the elections coming up over here. On this news program Digby Jones from the CBI (who I always hated) stated that a one percent rise in immigration brought a one-and a-half percent boost to the economy. Roughly translated as FUCK YOU Tory wankers.
April 25, 2005
WHAT A FUCKING SUPRISE
Can't find anything on the internet yet but I glanced an ominous headline in a supermarket
"Jamies school dinners heading for trouble"
Saw this coming really. Apparently loads of schools are stuck in 25 year contracts with these child poisoning bastards which will be very expensive to get out of...
I hope the campaign shifts up a gear rather than backing off. Shame the fuckers Jamie. Camp outside their fucking houses.
"Jamies school dinners heading for trouble"
Saw this coming really. Apparently loads of schools are stuck in 25 year contracts with these child poisoning bastards which will be very expensive to get out of...
I hope the campaign shifts up a gear rather than backing off. Shame the fuckers Jamie. Camp outside their fucking houses.
April 22, 2005
SO INTELLECTUAL
It came to me how much I hate intellectual snobbery when I was sitting with two people yesterday who thought that because I'd been trying to make a documentary about my nations favourite Islamic hate figure for two years, that made me their intellectual equal and therefore worth talking to. I always go into the same mode when I encounter such people. I interupt their flow, asking them to explain words I don't understand. When I am supposed to laugh I look at them blankly and say
"Sorry mate, I'm afraid I don't understand what you are talking about. I could pretend to if you want?"
I'm after that look they give people they believe to be intelectualy inferior.
A more politically active friend of mine showed me some footage once of a fairly famous American left-wing political writer and documentary maker who was talking to a small audience of friends at his house. He was talking about various Politicians and buisiness types he had met, dividing them into groups.
"Now he's intelligent, but so and so is not so intelligent." he went on like this for ages.
Since when does being more intelligent make you a better fucking person than someone else?
I think of intellectual snobs the same way I think of car drivers who continually shout and moan and tut at every other road user they come across. They are really annoying to be around in the same way. It must be so hard for them living in a world surrounded by so many inferior people.
I also hate uniformity and am glad that it blatantly doesn't work in my country. I love to be served by mumbling shop assistants who don't look at me or smile or tell me to have a nice fucking day. I want to see that these people are unhappy in their uniforms and can't wait to get back to their lives. I want them to gossip and ignore me and paint their fucking nails.
The best experience I ever had in a supermarket queue:
An old caribean lady in the usual bland, shapeless uniform was sitting behind her checkout making cheerful conversation with the woman she was serving.
"I bet she doesn't talk to me like that." I thought to myself, thinking she would judge me as wierd.
When it came to my turn she beeped the first of my items, looked up, fixed me with a deep stare and shouted at me
" WHAT IS IT? THIS LIFE?"
Fucking priceless.
"Sorry mate, I'm afraid I don't understand what you are talking about. I could pretend to if you want?"
I'm after that look they give people they believe to be intelectualy inferior.
A more politically active friend of mine showed me some footage once of a fairly famous American left-wing political writer and documentary maker who was talking to a small audience of friends at his house. He was talking about various Politicians and buisiness types he had met, dividing them into groups.
"Now he's intelligent, but so and so is not so intelligent." he went on like this for ages.
Since when does being more intelligent make you a better fucking person than someone else?
I think of intellectual snobs the same way I think of car drivers who continually shout and moan and tut at every other road user they come across. They are really annoying to be around in the same way. It must be so hard for them living in a world surrounded by so many inferior people.
I also hate uniformity and am glad that it blatantly doesn't work in my country. I love to be served by mumbling shop assistants who don't look at me or smile or tell me to have a nice fucking day. I want to see that these people are unhappy in their uniforms and can't wait to get back to their lives. I want them to gossip and ignore me and paint their fucking nails.
The best experience I ever had in a supermarket queue:
An old caribean lady in the usual bland, shapeless uniform was sitting behind her checkout making cheerful conversation with the woman she was serving.
"I bet she doesn't talk to me like that." I thought to myself, thinking she would judge me as wierd.
When it came to my turn she beeped the first of my items, looked up, fixed me with a deep stare and shouted at me
" WHAT IS IT? THIS LIFE?"
Fucking priceless.
April 20, 2005
LIBERAL EXTREMISTS?
Went down to a hustings in Bethnal Green today to see what all the fuss was about. I arrived at the end of an obvious fracass by the front door. My mate from the F.I.T. (Forward Intelligence) squad was there enthusiastically photographing as usual. I was a bit disapointed that he didn't recognise me or take my photo this time.
George Galloway had appeared in the London Evening Standard last night claiming to have been attacked by extremist Muslims. The same group apparently pelted his very beautiful rival Ooooooona at a Jewish memorial service and slashed her car's tyres.
Now if I was a voter in Bethnal Green I don't know who I'd go for. I fucking hate Galloway, but agree with most of what he says. I hate him because of his "indefatigable" comments about Saddam Hussain. I wouldn't trust him further than I could throw him. I get the feeling that he's a sun-tanned, opportunist, self publicising cunt who is trying his hardest to turn the genuine anti war feeling in this country into a personal "vote for me" campaign and all the "Stop the War" sheep are letting him get away with it.
I'd vote for Oooooona if she sat on top of me and ordered me to personaly because she is sexy, but (seriously now) I can understand the very angry Muslims who are calling her a hypocrite because she voted in favour of the war on Iraq.
No, I may still occasionaly exhibit political streaks but I'm afraid that I still haven't heard anything which would encourage me to vote. Even though the evil Michael Howard was personally involved in most of my political nightmares as I grew up I can't get into this "vote for the least worst candidate" shit either.
Fuck the lot of them. Personal evolution now.
Global, individual responsibility or we are all fucked. Thats my opinion anyway.
The hustings was funny though. Most people there were for Galloway or Oooooona who's supporter's cheered their own or booed each others candidate with great enthusiasm everytime they got up to speak. The Conservative candidate was only clapped by one person out of the 600 in the building whenever he got up to the podium. He had the good grace to joke about this, saying he hoped the lone voice would turn into thousands by May the 5th. He had to duck as a rather dirty blue prehistoric pig suddenly materialised and flew over his head and out into the audience.
My personal favourite was the Liberal guy. I haven't heard anyone speak like this since they locked Mr. Hamza up. He started angry and got louder and louder as he got into his stride. How come none of the right-wing papers have noticed him? I feel like writing to the Sun:
Guys! Help! He's a Muslim and he's shouting! That makes him an extremist no? You have to strain to understand what he's talking about but he sounds angry! Are there any more Liberal extremists lurking behind that bland, orange facade? Shouldn't you be looking into this?
When it came to his turn to answer questions almost everyone around me descended into riotous laughter. It was worth going just for him. It was also worth going for someone I bumped into outside. I followed perma-tan shitwit Galloway outside as reporters crowded him. If I had my camera with me I'd have asked about his "indefatigable" comments. I bit my tongue but was glad that someone else didn't.
A guy was challenging him over his calls for the release of Saddam's buddy Tariq Aziz. Galloway refused to answer and moved himself away. What do you think when politicians do this? Something to hide?
I spoke to the guy (Johann) afterwards who told me that Tariq Aziz was responsible for more Muslim deaths than Ariel Sharon- and Galloway had been on holiday with him six times.
Johann's website is really interesting. If we were more informed, less confused and not blatant drug abusers Socialistwanker would be more like this. He's also written a book about what a bunch of bastid's our Royal family are. I'm sure I agree with every word and I haven't even read it yet.
All in all a fun day out. If elections and electioneering are like watching paint dry everywhere else in the country it's definately kicking off in Bethnal Green.
George Galloway had appeared in the London Evening Standard last night claiming to have been attacked by extremist Muslims. The same group apparently pelted his very beautiful rival Ooooooona at a Jewish memorial service and slashed her car's tyres.
Now if I was a voter in Bethnal Green I don't know who I'd go for. I fucking hate Galloway, but agree with most of what he says. I hate him because of his "indefatigable" comments about Saddam Hussain. I wouldn't trust him further than I could throw him. I get the feeling that he's a sun-tanned, opportunist, self publicising cunt who is trying his hardest to turn the genuine anti war feeling in this country into a personal "vote for me" campaign and all the "Stop the War" sheep are letting him get away with it.
I'd vote for Oooooona if she sat on top of me and ordered me to personaly because she is sexy, but (seriously now) I can understand the very angry Muslims who are calling her a hypocrite because she voted in favour of the war on Iraq.
No, I may still occasionaly exhibit political streaks but I'm afraid that I still haven't heard anything which would encourage me to vote. Even though the evil Michael Howard was personally involved in most of my political nightmares as I grew up I can't get into this "vote for the least worst candidate" shit either.
Fuck the lot of them. Personal evolution now.
Global, individual responsibility or we are all fucked. Thats my opinion anyway.
The hustings was funny though. Most people there were for Galloway or Oooooona who's supporter's cheered their own or booed each others candidate with great enthusiasm everytime they got up to speak. The Conservative candidate was only clapped by one person out of the 600 in the building whenever he got up to the podium. He had the good grace to joke about this, saying he hoped the lone voice would turn into thousands by May the 5th. He had to duck as a rather dirty blue prehistoric pig suddenly materialised and flew over his head and out into the audience.
My personal favourite was the Liberal guy. I haven't heard anyone speak like this since they locked Mr. Hamza up. He started angry and got louder and louder as he got into his stride. How come none of the right-wing papers have noticed him? I feel like writing to the Sun:
Guys! Help! He's a Muslim and he's shouting! That makes him an extremist no? You have to strain to understand what he's talking about but he sounds angry! Are there any more Liberal extremists lurking behind that bland, orange facade? Shouldn't you be looking into this?
When it came to his turn to answer questions almost everyone around me descended into riotous laughter. It was worth going just for him. It was also worth going for someone I bumped into outside. I followed perma-tan shitwit Galloway outside as reporters crowded him. If I had my camera with me I'd have asked about his "indefatigable" comments. I bit my tongue but was glad that someone else didn't.
A guy was challenging him over his calls for the release of Saddam's buddy Tariq Aziz. Galloway refused to answer and moved himself away. What do you think when politicians do this? Something to hide?
I spoke to the guy (Johann) afterwards who told me that Tariq Aziz was responsible for more Muslim deaths than Ariel Sharon- and Galloway had been on holiday with him six times.
Johann's website is really interesting. If we were more informed, less confused and not blatant drug abusers Socialistwanker would be more like this. He's also written a book about what a bunch of bastid's our Royal family are. I'm sure I agree with every word and I haven't even read it yet.
All in all a fun day out. If elections and electioneering are like watching paint dry everywhere else in the country it's definately kicking off in Bethnal Green.
April 15, 2005
RICIN
So this was what Barry was talking about. When I last spoke to him he said that there were trials in the pipeline connected to Finsbury park mosque which were under a media blackout. He didn't go into detail but said that the evidence would "Enlighten people."
Read about Kamel Bourgass here
He gave his address as Finsbury park mosque. His ricin recipe was from the Mosque's photocopier. His friend sold books at the mosque. The evidence makes a direct link from Osama Bin laden through Bourgass to Finsbury park mosque.
He killed a Policeman.
Ever since Hamza was arrested I've found it hard to match up the seriousness of what's involved with the Muslim's I saw on the street. I find it really hard to believe that anyone I spoke to in two years was either a terrorist or would cover for one.
Not for the first time, I'm wondering if I am a bit out of my depth.
Vikram Dodd (who wrote the Guardian article about Abdullah and co getting thrown out of their mosque) casts doubt on the testimony used to convict Bourgass here
Read about Kamel Bourgass here
He gave his address as Finsbury park mosque. His ricin recipe was from the Mosque's photocopier. His friend sold books at the mosque. The evidence makes a direct link from Osama Bin laden through Bourgass to Finsbury park mosque.
He killed a Policeman.
Ever since Hamza was arrested I've found it hard to match up the seriousness of what's involved with the Muslim's I saw on the street. I find it really hard to believe that anyone I spoke to in two years was either a terrorist or would cover for one.
Not for the first time, I'm wondering if I am a bit out of my depth.
Vikram Dodd (who wrote the Guardian article about Abdullah and co getting thrown out of their mosque) casts doubt on the testimony used to convict Bourgass here
April 14, 2005
THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY
Being old enough to remember the original TV show I'm one of those who has been waiting the whole 25 years for this film. I was lucky enough to see it at a preview in Leicester square the other day. The huge advances in technology made the wait worthwhile.
The producer who introduced it said that they had spent four million quid promoting it and was almost begging this audience of cinema people to get behind it.
I never had envisaged the Ford Prefect character as black, but Mos Def pulled it off from the beginning. I hate John Malchovich but he also pulled off a fantastic cameo role here. Nice to see Jim Henson's creature workshop back in action too.
Martin Freeman (Tim from the Office) makes a fantastic Arthur Dent.
He turned up to answer questions afterwards. Interestingly enough he said that he didn't care about "The fate of the British Film industry" as agonised over by boring media people. He just was glad that good films were made by whoever made them. He also denied that the love story between Arthur and Trillian was tacked on for American audiences. I'm sure he's going to have to deny it and look convincing quite a lot over the next few weeks.
Good film though. Hitchhikers site here (Don't forget your towel.)
The producer who introduced it said that they had spent four million quid promoting it and was almost begging this audience of cinema people to get behind it.
I never had envisaged the Ford Prefect character as black, but Mos Def pulled it off from the beginning. I hate John Malchovich but he also pulled off a fantastic cameo role here. Nice to see Jim Henson's creature workshop back in action too.
Martin Freeman (Tim from the Office) makes a fantastic Arthur Dent.
He turned up to answer questions afterwards. Interestingly enough he said that he didn't care about "The fate of the British Film industry" as agonised over by boring media people. He just was glad that good films were made by whoever made them. He also denied that the love story between Arthur and Trillian was tacked on for American audiences. I'm sure he's going to have to deny it and look convincing quite a lot over the next few weeks.
Good film though. Hitchhikers site here (Don't forget your towel.)
SMILE.CO.UK
Could it really be that simple?
Just smile at every body. If they can’t handle it, they look away. Those who smile back can be a whole new journey for me and I for them.
For brief, heady days when I first came out of meditation in Pushkar I’ve had inklings of this wisdom. I also remember experiencing it briefly with friends on the Celestine Prophecy trip years ago, and on acid at every single party of 94-95, but that’s cheating.
I got it for nine beautiful days in Delhi when I gave up smoking dope one time. The hotel I was staying in actually called the Police to search my room I was smiling so much. I wouldn't let them go until they went through everything, smiling lovingly throughout. They have never let me stay there since.
Pissed in the sunshine I got it the other day drinking really nice white beer on my own. I was a bit daunted at first. When I got a smile back I didn’t know what to do and bailed out badly but the alcohol set me on my journey. Mike H turned up briefly, sunglassed and unshaven. He wouldn’t score me any scag as he was in human pincushion withdrawal mode again which apparently you need sunglasses for.
Bought me a pint this time though.
When he left I carried on with my smiling experiment. It was amazing. I never realized how many people wanted to smile at me and talk to me. If I can keep this up I could kick the whole depression thing.
It’s going to be hard, and is something I wouldn’t recommend to women who live in cities but the more genuine I can make a smile, the more genuine jewels of human behaviour I get back and the summers coming. Maybe this is how normal, happy people live.
Just smile at every body. If they can’t handle it, they look away. Those who smile back can be a whole new journey for me and I for them.
For brief, heady days when I first came out of meditation in Pushkar I’ve had inklings of this wisdom. I also remember experiencing it briefly with friends on the Celestine Prophecy trip years ago, and on acid at every single party of 94-95, but that’s cheating.
I got it for nine beautiful days in Delhi when I gave up smoking dope one time. The hotel I was staying in actually called the Police to search my room I was smiling so much. I wouldn't let them go until they went through everything, smiling lovingly throughout. They have never let me stay there since.
Pissed in the sunshine I got it the other day drinking really nice white beer on my own. I was a bit daunted at first. When I got a smile back I didn’t know what to do and bailed out badly but the alcohol set me on my journey. Mike H turned up briefly, sunglassed and unshaven. He wouldn’t score me any scag as he was in human pincushion withdrawal mode again which apparently you need sunglasses for.
Bought me a pint this time though.
When he left I carried on with my smiling experiment. It was amazing. I never realized how many people wanted to smile at me and talk to me. If I can keep this up I could kick the whole depression thing.
It’s going to be hard, and is something I wouldn’t recommend to women who live in cities but the more genuine I can make a smile, the more genuine jewels of human behaviour I get back and the summers coming. Maybe this is how normal, happy people live.
ANIMAL COMMUNICATION
Saw a bizarre thing whilst out walking a dog with a friend on the heath the other day. The dog was playing in the water of a pond, lowering his head to some ducks trying to make friends. I swear the ducks were turning round, splashing water at him.
The boss of this particular pond is a fascist swan policeman who comes over to confront any dog who dares to enter his territory. Seeing the dog playing with the ducks he came over as usual to enforce his authority, only this time he left the dog, instead attacking the ducks for daring to try and befriend a dog on his patch.
Bastard Swan.
The boss of this particular pond is a fascist swan policeman who comes over to confront any dog who dares to enter his territory. Seeing the dog playing with the ducks he came over as usual to enforce his authority, only this time he left the dog, instead attacking the ducks for daring to try and befriend a dog on his patch.
Bastard Swan.
BICYCLE THIEVES TWO
Bicycle thieves one was about a visit from a fairly typical young Finsbury park Fundamental Islamist (as opposed to the fearsome dangerous ones you read about in the paper.)
This one is about actual bicycle thievery.
I’m experiencing a gleeful rejection of all things eastern and mind manifesting in favour of a more familiar, English faith in alcohol as the solution to all problems. There are disadvantages. Wednesday I realized my bike was missing. I didn’t rush to accuse anyone of taking it out of the house as I had vague recollections of locking it somewhere. But where?
Over the day I realized that I had left it in L----- after I had met Abdullah and Jamal.
That was Sunday.
Pub’s, Rave’s, alcohol and drug fueled behaviour. This is how most British people spend their time no? I’ve never had such a taste for beer in my life.
Once I finally got to L---- three days later my bike was gone. I’ve had so many bikes nicked over the years I think of it as London’s way of saying “Hello” I’d have been disappointed with the local youth if I had found it still there to be honest.
This one is about actual bicycle thievery.
I’m experiencing a gleeful rejection of all things eastern and mind manifesting in favour of a more familiar, English faith in alcohol as the solution to all problems. There are disadvantages. Wednesday I realized my bike was missing. I didn’t rush to accuse anyone of taking it out of the house as I had vague recollections of locking it somewhere. But where?
Over the day I realized that I had left it in L----- after I had met Abdullah and Jamal.
That was Sunday.
Pub’s, Rave’s, alcohol and drug fueled behaviour. This is how most British people spend their time no? I’ve never had such a taste for beer in my life.
Once I finally got to L---- three days later my bike was gone. I’ve had so many bikes nicked over the years I think of it as London’s way of saying “Hello” I’d have been disappointed with the local youth if I had found it still there to be honest.
April 09, 2005
April 08, 2005
B IS REALLY GOOD….
I got an email from Mike H. who was really excited because he found a program to check webstats for blogs. People were reading his shit and that made him feel good. I read Mike H because his shit is good. I don’t care how many people read it. Its good. I fuckin love the guy. As soon as I work out how to check my webstats on this blog I’ll be obsessed with the same thing no doubt.
I've been continually annoyed by my profile views going up. Does this really count the number of people who have looked at my profile? I should make it more interesting.
EVERYONE- STOP LOOKING AT MY PROFILE
Middle class angst and the desire to achieve is a great thing.
That’s why I love Kimberley. Her stuff is from the guts. It doesn’t matter who she is or where she come’s from. It’s hardcore and punk because it’s fragile and from the guts.
I walk around London and people beep me when I dawdle at traffic lights. They are all obsessed with getting from A to B because B is really good. I want to jump out of their way.
“Go to B! It’s really good! “ I feel like shouting.
I feel the same way about my documentary project. A was first meeting Abu hamza, Abdullah and co, over two years ago.
“Go to B! It’s really good!”
B is where people realize that these Fundamentalists are just like you and me. They love, they hate. They laugh, they cry. We don’t need to be caught up in this “War on Terror” shit!
Go to B! It’s really good!
I hope no one thinks this is utopian propaganda. I am pissed out of my head and feel really shit.
I've been continually annoyed by my profile views going up. Does this really count the number of people who have looked at my profile? I should make it more interesting.
EVERYONE- STOP LOOKING AT MY PROFILE
Middle class angst and the desire to achieve is a great thing.
That’s why I love Kimberley. Her stuff is from the guts. It doesn’t matter who she is or where she come’s from. It’s hardcore and punk because it’s fragile and from the guts.
I walk around London and people beep me when I dawdle at traffic lights. They are all obsessed with getting from A to B because B is really good. I want to jump out of their way.
“Go to B! It’s really good! “ I feel like shouting.
I feel the same way about my documentary project. A was first meeting Abu hamza, Abdullah and co, over two years ago.
“Go to B! It’s really good!”
B is where people realize that these Fundamentalists are just like you and me. They love, they hate. They laugh, they cry. We don’t need to be caught up in this “War on Terror” shit!
Go to B! It’s really good!
I hope no one thinks this is utopian propaganda. I am pissed out of my head and feel really shit.
April 02, 2005
YOU'RE FAYED
Keith Allen's documentary totally lives up to all expectations and goes beyond. Mohamed Al-Fayed accuses Prince Phillip of being secretly in charge of the country, of aranging the death of his son Dodi and Princess Diana. Allen also uncovers the fact that Mohamed Al-Fayed actually invests in the places he lives, including backing Scottish campaigns against waste dumps etc.
You'd expect the media to be going mad the next day no?
Not a fucking word.
Heres some happy Scottish news about the documentary.
You'd expect the media to be going mad the next day no?
Not a fucking word.
Heres some happy Scottish news about the documentary.
April 01, 2005
THATS SNOW U-TURN!
Krishnan from C4's news and snowmails:
Amazing what you can achieve if you hit a populist cause just before an
election...
Jamie's Policy?
===================
With a straight face Ruth Kelly, the Education Secretary, insists it's
just a coincidence that she has announced an extra £220 million for
school meals in England on the day Jamie Oliver had breakfast with Tony
Blair and presented a petition with more than a quarter of a million
names on it demanding more money for school meals.
----- -----
In my wildest dreams I've often imagined celebrities using their status and the media to bypass politics and get the right thing done. Jamie Oliver has done it. I sincerely hope that Geldof and Bono can do the same thing this summer with the make poverty history campaign. Its the right thing to do.
Amazing what you can achieve if you hit a populist cause just before an
election...
Jamie's Policy?
===================
With a straight face Ruth Kelly, the Education Secretary, insists it's
just a coincidence that she has announced an extra £220 million for
school meals in England on the day Jamie Oliver had breakfast with Tony
Blair and presented a petition with more than a quarter of a million
names on it demanding more money for school meals.
----- -----
In my wildest dreams I've often imagined celebrities using their status and the media to bypass politics and get the right thing done. Jamie Oliver has done it. I sincerely hope that Geldof and Bono can do the same thing this summer with the make poverty history campaign. Its the right thing to do.
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