K EVERYWHERE

I did some research on yesterdays blog and found the information to be correct. At a party on Hampstead Heath I was passed a small plastic bag with a rolled note in it by someone who worked in conflict resolution. As I haven't done any of this in years (most of my k times are recorded here) and probably due to surprise and wine I obliged.

After that I might have insisted that, as everyone jumped into taxis that my bike was no use to me locked up in North London, and that I was fine to cycle through London's busy streets to a party in Holborn somewhere. On that journey I might have had strong affinities with Mr Hoffman's cycling escapades. I might even have screamed at every nightclub queue I passed

"You are alive! FOR A REASON!!"

with everyone shouting "Fark orrf" back at me.

Outside 200 Grays Inn I might have bumped into the court journalist I met at Hamid and Atilla's trial, finnishing his last day of work there. Maybe I screamed at the stars for no apparent reason. Maybe there was a cosmic reason. I am not sure. I think maybe I was explaining such an idea to him in a lot of detail before he dissapeared.

When I got to the party I might have found the open bottle of wine in my bag still contained about as much wine as it had on the Heath.

Maybe I bumped into a documentary maker who might have started ridiculing my efforts to film in Finsbury park. I think he gave up after a bit and gave me some advice.

"Well Hamza has said some things which have a bearing on International relations"

"True. Or maybe he is this guy who just says things."

"Maybe you should deconstruct what Hamza says for the viewing public?" he suggested.

"Sort of a we're right and they are wrong style of thing? Sort of like everyone else has been doing?" I wondered.

He spoke a lot more about "The noble thing to do" with my stuff.

His friend said that he didn't like docos where the documentary maker put himself in the movie (like his pal obviously did). I sort of agreed with him but acknowledged that this was what broadcasters liked. He said he felt he was being told what to think. Maybe, I said, or maybe you are just going on a journey through documentary maker's personal thought process.

I think I ended up on good terms with both of them and impressed upon them that I couldn't really consider myself to be a film maker till I had finnished a film, and that even if I never finnished a film I wasn't unhappy with what I have been doing.

Overall I had a really good night. I hadn't been to a wild party in ages and it was a surprise for me how easily I slipped back into it all. I had some really genuine conversations with some really fucked people. There is nothing intrinsically wrong or fake about the party lifestyle and today I feel like I have blown away a few cobwebs.

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