MALUNG TV. TO OPEN YOUR EYES AND TO LOOK.

I tried to post this yesterday.

OK day four. Skipped meditation with, how shall we say, consequences. I realise that its tempting to take solace in drink rather than face what I have to face, also coffee has adjusted my mood more than I would like today. I've been wondering if this is a process of removal with London being the last thing on the list.

Clicking through Bill X's Omegaprojektet I noticed an interesting article about the US Marines stepping up their hunt for deserters of the Vietnam era. I had already been thinking about why soldiers and terrorists cross lines of “acceptable behaviour” after watching Road to Guantanamo. In the article one of the deserters spoke about Vietnam era Marines with necklaces of human ears from the Mai lai massacres.

This is beyond my comprehension, but to me Malung TV is all about trying to face things that aren't in the scope of my comprehension, (including in this diary format, facing myself) hence the fascination with Republican thinking and with Fundamental Islam. I can't imagine wanting to massacre or wanting a necklace of ears. I used to think this was because I was a toker until my bong experiences told me that all these states must exist within all of us. Also, as every toker knows the word “assassin” comes from “Hashshashin” a tribe of ganja fueled killers from the Golan heights.

Anyway, this week I also took a look at some online news people made with Abu Hamza where he says he would be a hypocrite if he didn't admit to being happy about 9/11 and also justifies the guys who took Western hostages in Yemen (four of whom died) to bargain for his sons and their friends release saying “We have warned people not to go to these hot spots”.

I never got round to speaking to Mohssain, Mustapha or Shahid about all this, which is a shame. The Encyclopedia of Afghani Jihad seemed, from what I heard at the trial, to contain established ways to de-stablise regimes gleaned from CIA manuals which were themselves put together from many years trial and error. Hamza and co train in Afghanistan to do it freelance, the US forces do the same in Iraq on a larger scale.

I can't understand any of it. I don't have the belief either the CIA or the Jihadi's have. I can only open my eyes. Look. Try to understand and see if that understanding enables me to contribute in some way towards a solution. Looking into this ear necklace shit I found more recent disturbing images from Iraq. I can't understand the mentality of people who would take pictures of tanks running over bodies, or heads caught in tank tracks.

I wonder if there is a yearning in some people to cross boundaries of human behaviour. Whether the sanctioned communal experience of a group of marines in these “extreme reaction” forces in Guantanamo grunting and stomping their way to a cage and beating the shit out of the occupant is necessary for them in some way.

Maybe they need an enemy. They need that enemies body parts mangled in their tank tracks. The “Milblogs” monicker justifies this so: "Good people sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf."

I think I'm going to read more of these. I remember a film about D.H. Lawrence where an Australian fascist says that killing another human being made him feel like a saint. It occurs to me that maybe Marines enjoy this freedom. They need it.

I don't know if I am a pacifist, as I've said in an earlier post, I'm a crysalis at the moment.The methods of Ghandi to gain an Independent Indian state definitely resonate with me, but I spent my formative years wanting to be like Jesus, so I'm not surprised I'm like this now.

When I used to think about massacres in Cambodia and Rwanda I wondered whether the Yin Yang thing meant that there would always be clouds of evil hovering around the planet which required people to be reduced to body parts. Maybe the compulsion of violent films or competitive sports is a strain of the same bloodlust.

Then i try and think about how a concept of "God" might fit in to all this. The Koran contains examples of hostage situtations, the Old testament is extremely bloodthirsty. Whenever I think there might be a benevolent God I am reminded of examples from nature itself which seem to suggest quite the opposite.

I don't know why I as a human being have a buring desire, almost a “faith” that humanity will one day rise above all of this. I'm no stary eyed hippy. If we are going to do it we can't shy away from facing all of this in ourselves and in others.

I am drawn to what Mozzam Begg says at the end of his piece:

"...People in power do not like to talk about compromise, and they do not like to talk about speaking to the other side. But in essence, if they do not do that, then the spiral of violence can only get worse."

How many times have we heard this? How many times have I mentioned this with increasing frustration? Its not fucking rocket science. I'd talk to any of them with a camera running. Terrorists about destablising dictatorships, Soldiers about running over dead bodies in tanks- the lot, but not in situ. I have no desire to wear a blue bullet proof vest and a blue hemet marked TV filming people shooting at each other. I just want everyone to get over it.